T-minus 47 days

My list of things to do before deployment seems to be growing by the minute.  The anxiety is building.  It seems that tears seem to fall down my face all the time, at the most inopportune time, big ol' giant crocodile tears.  It's pretty pathetic actually.  I know I look like a total fool.  The kids at school must think I have completely fallen off my rocker.  I'm really just counting down the days to Christmas break to enjoy a little downtime with Daddy and the girls.  Only 4 more work days to go.  I am really not in the Christmas spirit.  I've got a tree up.  Not that I really wanted a fake tree.  I think it's ugly.  JoJo did a great job decorating it.  I just think fake trees are just that - FAKE.  I'm a real tree kind of girl.  This year...well it just did not happen.  We were blessed with this tree.  Things are pretty tight, didn't even think we could get a tree.  But good old Freddy's had all the fake ugly trees they had left on clearance. Couldn't pass up a $15 tree.  Yep...$15. I know Christmas is not about gifts.  It's not GIFT-mas, it's CHRIST-mas.  We are thankful for the blessing we have.  I may not know what will be on the table tomorrow or how it will get there but I know that I have a roof over my head, my health, my husband, my girls and the Lord.  God is good.  I know that because the day we had our power disconnected (yep...sucks hun?) we got an awesome full sized Gillette Fusion ProGlide Razor sample in the mail.  How awesome is that! Daddy was just complaining about how our razors sucked...and God provided him with a good one!  It's one of those that you got a coupon for $5 off the refill cartridge.  See I told you God is GOOD!  I know I can get through this craziness, once I let go.  Once I turn to God, and let help hold my hand.  I'll get there...I've got to.